The good side of any breakup is the opportunity to learn (hopefully!) from the experience and to look forward to the next one. Yup, I've done it before and I'm doing it again.It feels different this time. I feel like I've honestly turned a corner, had an emotional breakthrough. I guess time will tell, but I've had a few pretty potent signs. I'm going to keep them to myself for now, but I will tell you that I've been feeling the most amazing feelings lately. I feel calm, I feel at peace, and - dare I say it - I think this is what it feels like to be... happy.

I recently found a really interesting post, Lesbian Bed Death Explained, by Susan Kuchinskas at Scientific Blogging, that I couldn't resist sharing.

Expectations scare the crap out of me. If I have expectations of people, they can let me down and I'll get hurt. If I allow other people to have expectations of me, then I might let them down and they'll get hurt. It's really a lot easier to avoid expecting anything from anyone and to discourage anyone from having expectations of me.

June's been a rough month for me. My boyfriend broke up with me... again, and then a few pretty horrid, unexpected things happened on top of that. It's just one thing after another this month, and I gotta be honest with you - Today was a day when I just felt completely beat down. Why does bad stuff happen all at once?Well, sometimes it does. And we've really got no choice in life but to learn how to get through it and how to have faith that things - and we - will get happy again. Somehow.

I'm not a scientist; I don't have a PhD; I don't conduct research studies for a living. But I read the news. I read blogs. I talk to people, and I observe. Based on what I’ve seen, heard, and observed, I truly don't believe married women are happier than single women just because they happen to be in a relationship. Barring a catastrophic event or a clinical diagnosis, happiness is a choice, regardless of your relationship status. Are some married women blissfully happy? Of course. Are there also blissfully happy single women? No doubt.

The Sex and Relationships Birds of a Feather meeting is happening at BlogHer '08 on Friday July 18th at 3:15pm. If sex and/or relationship blogging is something you do - even just sometimes or even just in your blogging dreams - I hope you'll join us.